Hey, let's be careful out there. [Esterhaus]

From The East Bay Express:

So That's Why People Live in Piedmont

Between 7 a.m. and 3 p.m. on July 5, Piedmont police records show reports of a house being egged, a loud leaf-blower, a blocked driveway, two off-leash dogs, a car parked too long, "a suspicious person carrying a plastic bag," a dead rat, and a dead cat. That's it. Within those same hours in Oakland, police records show five shootings, an assault with a deadly weapon, three armed robberies, a strong-arm robbery, an assault with a deadly weapon, and an unexplained death. That's it.

Gypin' N Rippin! The Shops. Part 1.

Schultzie,a good buddy of mine, and former bike rat coworker, reminded me of a bike shop episode that begged for blogging...and he's right, it's priceless, but it will have to wait. It got me thinking of where it all began, back in this tired old rag of a neighborhood in Detroit, at the indefatigable G & R Bike shop. The Frenchman bought the place from the original owners who had decided there was more money to be had in gas stations and rep'ing. They gave the Frenchman, then a current employee, terms he couldn't refuse, and he found himself the sole owner and proprieter. I don't think he was yet 24 at the time (I plan on confiming this...). The was one small catch. The name had to stay. Now, as I said, this was kinda sad little section of Detroit, circa 1979. Not rough in the gangbanger sense, people generally just trying to get by, but pretty rough around the edges. Petty theft was an everyday occurace and everyone of age in the shop was packing or had one at the ready. Not a single bike on the floor had pedals installed thus ensuring a fair foot race if one should suddently find legs. During the summers, an endless parade of yoots loitered in the shop, killin' time and hassling us for sport. Once in a while they'd buy a patch kit. Mostly though, they just heckled from the isles. One particular day, I was being grilled by a young pair of citizenry on the price of every bmx bike we had on the floor, color commentary retorted to every price I slung. Finally, one yoot asked what the initials in the name of the shop stood for? His foil beat me to the bell. "Gypin' an Rippin' Yo! Game, set and match. We laughed all summer.

"This number is also very trainable."

Harumph. That's a direct quote taken from a write up of a fitness test I just completed. Translation: You are one outta shape M-Fer. More dis-heartening is what that sentence implies; that my other suck-ass performance metrics are here to stay. Why oh why can't I just accept that fact that my genetic makeup predisposes me to a sport requiring a significantly less aerobic/anaerobic talent base...like cribbage.

Cycling Goodness from Monkey Dust!

Called out.

So gewilli called me out today and I am deeply humiliated.I tried, I really did. I'm so embarrassed. It was a moment of weakness...and a very expensive one. I didn't want a power meter. It just showed up. Really. I didn't want FTP, STP, power profiles, CNS, CVS, WKO+, REO, CPV, TSS, NP, MMP, NAN or any of that other crap. I opened up Pandora's box and all those acronyms just came spilling out all over the floor. Now gewilli is thoroughly disgusted with me AND I've got one hell of a mess to clean up. Oh how do I get back in thine good graces? Would telling you I also got a coach work?

There is an upside. Being the self-loathing defeatist that I am, being able to quantify ones suckness in multicolored graphs does hold a certain morbid appeal.

Things I've learned while riding around w/ a PowerTap

I sUck. Stupid PowerTap.

Why Run.

A comment posted to the "Running is Hard" blog echoed something I've heard often when I tell cross friends I'm running more. "Why not spend that time riding?" Good question. Here's the answer(s).

1) I dont' have more time to ride. On days when time is tight, I can get a 45 minute run in at 5:15 in the morning and be back before the kids wake up. I think it's time better spent than the equivalent 45 minutes on the bike. The dividends of 8 hours on the bike + 45 minutes running seems greater than 8:45 on the bike. At least that's what I'm telling myself.

2) I'm not running to get faster during the running sections of a cross race. There's no logic in that. I think this is a huge misconception on the part of those who eschew running. I'm doing it so that the hole I dig myself into during those running sections is not as deep.

3) It's been a real mental challenge. The mind games I've needed to play during hard runs are far more elaborate than those I use on myself while on the bike ;-)

4) And lastly, at my age, a little more bone density can only be a good thing.

The good news is, it doesn't take alot of miles to accomplish these goals. You still need to build a bit of base before doing speed work, but we're not talking marathon miles. They jury is still out on all of this, mind you. It's the first season I've decided to do this. I could end up being even slower than last year. I'll be sure to keep y'ins posted. What's slower than DFL?

Running is Hard

I've learned a lot running these last 6 months; running down steep trails is a black art, trying to 'softpedal' while running makes you come to a complete stop, You can't eat ANYTHING 30 minutes prior to a run, and I now know why walkmans were invented. Running is mind-numbing. It's also mentally taxing, much more so than road racing. That's probably a function of experience. My bicycle racing demons and I are on a first name basis. My runnings demons own my sorry butt. I haven't wanted to quit something so painful in a long time. "chapeau" to runners everywhere. Christ it's hard.

Running is Stupid.

Actually I'm stupid, running is just the grist for the mill, whatever the hell that means. Here's the proof. This year I decided to add more running to my cyclocross training. To keep my self motivated, I decided to train for a fast 10k come June. My running "coach", El Super Burrito, a co-worker and ironman tri-guy extraordinaire, helped get my program in line. The plan was simple. Add a few days of running to my cycling program until race time, then tapper off the running a bit and increase the saddle time. Well, when we sat down to find the 10k that worked for both our work/family schedules, the only thing that meshed was the Dick Houston Memorial Woodminster Race. Hmmm let us think a bit...I've been training mostly on the flats, looking to hold a 6:50-7:00 pace. Now let's look at the course profile. Yep, that race suites me perfect! How do you go from training for a fast 10k to racing a 8.82 trail course w/1700+ ft up climbing? Being stupid, That's how.

Holy Crap!

Thanks Margaret! Hazmatmodine!

Pink wins.

I love the Tour de France, but come on, no one really looks good in yellow. Pink on the other hand...

Just...can't...help...myself

If You Have a Bike!

I hate "commuter guy".

I leave the house like clockwork. Not swiss train schedule clockwork mind you, but not Amtrak either. With the girls in tow, I head out to school. More often then not I see him en route. It's either a red RB-1 or a yellow Torelli. I'm not sure how he decides which rig to ride. I dont' care. all I know is, I USE TO BE COMMUTER GUY DAMMIT!

Old Skool

Nice to see some Pro riders can still think for themselves...
















...well almost ;-)

Stalking Christopher.

The only question I have is...

Why isn't the Barney track 1st on the playlist? 4 seconds into that and I called my mom to tell her where I hid my Playboys.

Desiree Palmen.

jump for yourself.

Falling off the data wagon.

I'm teetering on the brink. I can feel it. The slope is too steep....and besides I kinda want to fall off/in. You see, I use to be a data nut. The fire has always been there, I'm a science nerd after all, but my friend Jaybird fanned the flames. He's an engineer and we were teammates...scientist+ engineer + racing: recipe for disaster smeared all over it. We were those fidiots sporting ginormously ugly, phenomenally expensive, Polar HRs with download capability back in the 80's . Long before the Joe Friel Training Bible, there was the Jaybird Datalog. A handmade binder of datasheets built in excel. I wore my HR all the time...yes, All. The. Time. I was such a loser. And I recorded everything. Everything. *Ding*, we have a loser. Christ. all I can do is sit here and shake my head. For years, I lived data...HR, RPE, Kilos, Km, VO2, blaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Then I went cold turkey. Shunned it all. Stripped the computers off the bikes and lived like a hermit. I needed nothing but two wheels and focused furry! Truth is, I probably didn't like what all the data was telling me...that I was a sloth. It's much easier to lie to yourself when you tear away the electrodes and act dumb. Then I met Rhoda. He's also a teammate, but from a different decade...this one. And he IS the Modern Major General of data guys. He owns all the latest acronyms, monitors all the forums and my heads spins in the glorious data that pours forth from the digital realm of which he is truly king. I NEEED a powermeter. I MUST have a Garmin. Andy Coggan is the new Scientology!!!!!!!!!!!! JesusMaryJosephandalltheApostles, somebody save me from myself...or at least buy me a Powertap...2.4 Sl please. Whew!

Why some people choose to be doctors...and Why I did not.

Neck, oral cavity and cranium, originally uploaded by Stanford Medicine.

While I have a morbid curiosity about such things, I'm just not cut out to work in this medium on a daily basis. I can certainly see why others choose to do so. No finer example of engineering exists. It facinates and makes me oogy all at once.

Rain Cancels? Pthffffffft

_DSC0020, originally uploaded by Bici Girl photos.

Being part of a club w/ a large road contigent, I often see those two words. They always come at the end of a ride description detailing some upcoming 3 hour tour. The ride profile is always epic..70+ miles, 8 jillion feet of climbing, no regroup, bleeding eyeballs, near death experience and oh, rain cancels.

Then there are my people. People who know full well what's in store and drive hours to get to it. Hallelujah!

Happy Boy! Race Report #12

_DSC0059, originally uploaded by Bici Girl photos.

O. K. NOW i'm done. Thank you Peak Season and Mother Nature for a great course and even better weather. I may not have raced well, but damn if I didn't have fun riding like an idiot. Hypothermia, pink eye and giardia be damned. Best race of the year, bar none.

Why Cross Rulz: Reason #50

Ben pulling Brad??, originally uploaded by Bici Girl photos.

I'm still laughing.

What I need to do on my summer vacation

Now that cross season is *almost* over (see previous post), eyes turn uncontrollably skyward, searching the stars for clues to the eternal question, "How can I improve, how can I be better, how can I get faster... without doing any of the work"? It's that last part that always trips me up. I tried it this season and while I was able to ride less and ignore my training plan almost entirely, my result inexplicably suffered. My coach, Sister Lee, thinks that my problem is rooted in a previous life spent as lichen. The cure for purging my licheness turns out to be quite expensive, much more so than a 3 month run of EPO. When I asked for the EPO instead, she said she wasn't that kind of doctor, or any kind of doctor for that matter.

Now what the hell am I supposed to do. Race reports 10/11 and Beyond

I had intended to race the 22nd and 29th. Our oldest one got sick the first time, I got sick the second. I would have gladly taken both bullets as few things pain me more than watching my small child wretch (*shudder*) and thus ends the race reports. The trouble lies in the fact that the 29th was the last race on MY calendar, and if I had done them, well or not, I could have called my season 'Fini'. But now I've got this splinter festering and it just won't work itself out. O.K. so the real trouble is a character defect. The season feels undone. Why can't I just let it pass and look forward. Sometimes I hate my work ethic.

It's all so clear to me know.

Maggie...In the beginning.

After seeing the Maggie post, a friend back in Michugina said he probably had a photo of her lashed to a rig. It occurred to me that if he had one, I prolly did too. 15 minutes later, I had it! A little outta focus, but you get point. The photos are circa 1992-1993. The bike, a Specialized Epic. The race, a Chicago cross race in freezing temperatures. This was my pit bike back then. After the 4 hour drive back to Naptown, most of the ice chunks had fallen off. I got on the scale at a friends house after the race. 15lbs of that stuff was glued to the frame. Check out the crankset! LOL! I must have been completely insane back then. Driving 4 hours each way to race cross is some of the crappiest conditions on the planet...repeatedely! This particular race I remember well. No one knew who won since we all fled to our cars in fear of frostbite. All the spectators...yes there were actually spectators....we're talking Chicago tough..were situated at the bottom of a long icy hill that was so slick, mid race you had no choice but to slide down on yer beedum. At the bottom was a not-as-yet frozen stream. The crowed booed if you didn't try to ride it. Like I said, Chicago tough.

Race report # 8/9 Damn! The return of the HLN8R

This weekend I had a double on the calendar. The district championships on Saturday and the final Pilarcitos series race on Sunday. Both courses I knew well. Districts were held at the same course responsible for this post. Although the turn-out was comparatively small and the more important race was arguably the following day, no one told the fast guys. The course, already a flat and fast one, was designed to allow for more bigringyness than I care for...it was smokin fast. I tried to hang w/ the freight train for the 1st lap, but cold legs just couldn't hold the pace and I eased off. Got passed by a couple of others but couldn't respond just yet. Finally, about 20 minutes in, my legs came around just as Legolas and Fire Marshall Bill caught me. They are two of the fastest 45+ A's and had started 30 seconds back. Fortuna finally smiled. I was able to hang w/ them for almost two laps before they started attacking one another. Bastards. The good news was, I had reeled in two or three and had another in my sights. Now all I could do was pray they motored past so he couldn't jump the wheel. They did and he couldn't. I smelled blood, but had less than a lap to reel him in. The problem was that on this course there's no hiding. It's wide open and it's easy to mark someone of you've got the legs. I gassed it on the longs stairs and got w/in about 5 seconds. He saw me and surged. I hit it again at the triple and the long straight almost making contact. He dug deep and jumped. I finally caught him on the last set of barriers 100 yrds from the finish. Clean re-mount. Click-Click. I had it. Three cheers and a Tiger for me. I just buried myself and almost puked for something-teenth place! whoohoo.
Now Sunday was the real treat. I didn't race. The HLN8R did. Her 1st race in 5 years. Not only had she not raced, but her total time on the bike this year is hovering around 50 hours. Yep, you read that right. Let's not discount the two kids in that hiatus either. She also decided to debut at one of the harder, more technical coursed around. I don't know if I mentioned it before, but this woman has more athletic talent in her sock than there is in the sum total of my historical DNA. My jealousy of that fact I endure with a glacial calm. For her, going from C to B, back to A is a season. For me, that's a lifetime. Anyway. I truly loved watching her race again. She said she had a good start, hitting it from the back row to pass a bunch on the climb at the start. Then she endo'd big time. I didn't see it, but she said it rang her bell. She mentioned that she just wasn't use to the power of the canti's and heading into the first downhill section, she grabbed a handfull of brake and sailed. It wasn't until we were in the car that it hit me. We both run moto on the cross bikes. She spends nearly all of her bike time on the road. I'm switching it over this weekend. I felt guilty. She thought it was funny. HLN8R, you are my hero.

For My Littlest Sister.

Buy n Large.

Pixar. Genius. All this for a movie that won't be out until June.
*Sigh*. Several people have asked me to explain this post. Granted, it is vague...
intentionally so. ;-)

Buy n Large

Maggie

My daughter saw Maggie sitting on my workbench. "What's that!" she cried. I had come across my old mojo while searching in attic boxes for something else. I proceeded to tell her that way back when, silly trinkets were to mountain bikes as spokecards are to fixies today-tres Hipster. Blank stares. My daughter has never seen the Simpsons. I am both proud and ashamed of that fact. We don't watch TV=proud. I'm a huge Simpsons fan, yet cannot share that w/ my 5 year old= ashamed. She also isn't too sure about the whole alleycat/fixie craze, but I digress. I took a different tack. "She used to bring me luck" I said. "Well why not try her now?" I had no antithesis to her thesis so on the bike she went. Truth is, I'm glad she's back.

MOOO! Race report #7

I raced like a cow. Now who's the doofus. Not fun. This weekend was the Pilarcitos series race in Golden Gate Park, arguably the best courses of the year. I hadn't raced in over a month so I was a bit anxious, but fer crumb sake I didn't think I'd actually forget how to ride a f-ing bike. I was all over the place. While I'm no longer fast, I take pride in the fact that I'm pretty smooth, at least 120 grit. As a matter of fact, when I tell people how poorly I finished they often remark "Gee, well you LOOKED fast". I live for those moments, really I do. I'm also the goddamn TAPE guy. I've been using it for years. I rolled one and after popping it back on, had to pretend I was racing in the mud the last two laps. I'm sure Rhoda was secretly pleased. Now it was a pretty dramatic crash that caused the roll, so I'm not flipping back to glue pots just yet, but I'll be a little less cavalier in the future. To further chalkboard me, the guy on my six started giving me advice! GRRRrrrrrrrrrr. As if I wasn't already cheesed enough, Mr "I forgot my race number so now I've got this crayola one I made all by myself" telling me to carry more speed into the corners. Did you not see me putting my tire back on the rim when you went by! It frosted me enough to do the unthinkable...chase him down! Afterward, I realized I had too much gas left. Way to much. Anyone got a siphon?

First Things First.

Pictured here we see the Italian National Cyclocross Team mechanics prepping for the day's race. These guys are all Aces in my book. Screw the tire pressure, I want another ristretto.

milk nose.

Kitty is a dear friend of mine from way back. The kind of friend that even though we don't talk for long stretches, we can pick up where we left off and hardly skip. We're both busy, well I am anyway. I'm pretty sure she just roams around her brickstone in a housedress and curlers, lighting one Eve from the butt of another. For her sake though, let us all pretend she's busy too. I'm more busy though o.k. so my neglect of the relationship can be justified at some abstract level. Hers on the other hand...well...ahem. Then, at random intervals, she sends me stuff like this and I know all is right with the world.

---

A couple weeks ago I was back in Michigan. While I was in town my buddy called me and asked me to help him install an attic fan in his ceiling. While my buddy I were fitting the fan in between the joists, we found something under the insulation. What we found was this:

A JC Penney catalog from 1977. It's not often blog fodder just falls in my lap, but holy hell this was two solid inches of it, right there for the taking. I thumbed through it quickly and found my next dining room set, which is apparently made by adding upholstery to old barrels:
















Also, I am totally getting this for my bathroom:
















There's plenty more home furnishings where those came from, however I'm not going to bore you with that. Instead, I'm going to bore you with something else. The clothes.

The clothes are fantastic.

Here's how to get your ass kicked in elementary school:






















Just look at that belt. It's like a boob-job for your pants. He probably needed help just to lift it into place. The belt loops have to be three inches long. And way to pull them up to your armpits, grandpa.

Here's how to get your ass kicked in high school:






















This kid looks like he's pretending to be David Soul, who is pretending to be a cop who is pretending to be a pimp that everyone knows is really an undercover cop. Who is pretending to be 15.

Here's how to get your ass kicked on the golf course:























This "all purpose jumpsuit" is, according to the description, equally appropriate for playing golf or simply relaxing around the house. Personally, I can't see wearing this unless you happen to be relaxing around your cell in D-block. Even then, the only reason you should put this thing on is because the warden made you, and as a one-piece, it's slightly more effective as a deterrent against ass-rapery.

Here's how to get your ass kicked pretty much anywhere:






















If you look at that picture quickly, it looks like Mr. Bob "No-pants" Saget has his hand in the other guy's pocket. In this case, he doesn't, although you can tell just by looking at them that it's happened - or if it hasn't happened it will. Oh yes. It will. As soon as he puts down his matching coffee cup.

Here's how to get your ass kicked at the beach:






















He looks like he's reaching for a gun, but you know it's probably just a bottle of suntan lotion in a holster.

How to get your ass kicked in a meeting:






















If you wear this suit and don't sell used cars for a living, I believe you can be fined and face serious repercussions, up to and including termination. Or imprisonment, in which case you'd be forced to wear that orange jumpsuit.

How to get your ass kicked on every day up to and including St. Patrick's Day






















Dear god in heaven, I don't believe that color exists in nature. There is NO excuse for wearing either of these ensembles unless you're working as a body guard for the Lucky Charms leprechaun.

In this next one, Your Search For VALUE Ends at Penneys.
















As does your search for chest hair.

And this -- Seriously. No words.






















Oh wait, it turns out that there are words after all. Those words are What. The. F*ck. I'm guessing the snap front gives you quick access to the chest hair. The little tie must be the pull tab.

Also, judging by the sheer amount of matching his/hers outfits, I'm guessing that in 1977 it was considered pretty stylish for couples to dress alike. These couples look happy, don't they?














































I am especially fond of this one, which I have entitled "Cowboy Chachi Loves You Best."























And nothing showcases your everlasting love more than the commitment of matching bathing suits. That, and a blonde girl with a look on her face that says "I love the way your junk fights against that fabric."

Then, after the lovin', you can relax in your one-piece matching terry cloth jumpsuits:






















I could go on, but I'm tired, and my eyes hurt from this trip back in time. I think it's the colors. That said, I will leave you with these tasteful little numbers:






















Man, that's sexy.

OH SWEET JEEZUS!

She's B-e-a-u-ti-ful. Please god please please please please! I soooo dont' need one of these.
Thank you SkyMall, Thank you!


Donuts. Is there anything they cant' do.
-Homer

...wonders if one can put a chicken in it?

Team Pride.

We've got it in spades.
Christ, it looks like the Sears just blew up.
Photo by Lauren.

Race report # 5 1/2. Soquel+Speedvagen Acid Test.

Soquel. Home of my one and only cross win....a looooooong time ago in a galaxy far, far...oh never mind. Obviously, I have a soft spot for Soquel, but this year she decided she was in love with someone else. It was a really good course. Lot's of tricky transitions. Look down to see what gear you are in and you're off into the tape. Grass, gravel, loose run-up, whoopdees, pavement, costumes, beer. Crazy. The first lap was a cluster-f*ck as usual. Look folks, strong doesn't equal skilled. If you can't ride off-camber, or handle a tricky transition, get the hell outta the A's or stage at the back. I got passed by the same nut-job 3 times. Sure he was stronger, but I was faster. He was crashing everwhere, and taking people out w/him. Doofus. Anyway, a 1/3rd of the way into the 3rd lap, I picked up a goathead. No! I didn't have any dad-gum sealant for the 10th time...back off. Ran/rode to the pit. It was of course at the start/finish. That meant for a long jog and I got passed by nearly everyone. Grabbed the pit bike and realized I was running about 30 psi in the clinchers...sh!t. It was only a matter of time. Can't worry about that now...Caught a few stragglers then PFFFFffffssssssst. Done. Double Flat. Never had that happen. Ce'st la vie. At least I've got a thermos of coffee and rice krispie treats back in the truck. On the positive side, It was a true litmus test for the speedvagen geometry. I nearly killed myself on the pit bike trying to take the same lines I was taking earlier in the race. I was also surprised at how quickly I had adopted to SRAM, screwing up several shifts on the shimano equipped pit bike. Guess I'd better change that one over at some point. Lessons learned; Sealant? Oh, I know this one, I know this one...YES! ALWAYS. Now who's the doofus.
Always check tire pressure. Finally, be sure to lineup in front of the super strong doofus brigade.
Photo By Abbiorca.com

The World Bores You When You're Cool.

PuddinPie normally races SS and B's back-to-back. That's right. He uses the SS race as a freakin warm-up. Dont' be fooled by the sobriquet. He is the suffer king. There is a 15 minute break between those races which gives him just enough time to change numbers. Sunday, for what ever reason, he only raced the B's. The face says it all. Tedious. He was so bored he dozed off mid-race. I do SO dig the gold-toes. Classy, Super Classy.

Why Cross Rulz: Reason 49

photo by Lauren

Ode to Abbiorca. Shameless Plug to Garner Favor.

Nancy and Russ are great people. Genuinely nice people. The kind of people that bug me...but in a good way. The kind of way that feels like a tiny burr stuck inside your sock, reminding you to be nice and let that idiot into your lane. Anyway, being the nice people that they are, I happily give them money. Why? because they are awesome photographers. They are better at it than they are at being nice! Reverse that and they'd be saints with point-n-shoots. Any way, you've prolly seen their stuff and not even known it. They shoot all over the place, have made the cover of "Rolling Stone", love cross (and cycling in general) but best of all make they me look good. Not runway model good. They are not miracle workers after all. But cross good. Suffering good. Dirt in the teeth good. They even manage to make me look as if I'm in a race instead of riding around by myself in a field. Thanks you guys. Thanks. Without your pics, no one would believe I actually showed up. Oh and will someone please tell me why the hell I was whistling?

I HEART bikesnobNYC

I'm a huge fan of BSNYC. I agree w/ everything he says, even the things I don't agree with.
Better still, his derisiveness allows me to come off as sunny and cheerful!

Clif notes for cross.

I so wish I had written this! Once again it's BSNYC. Almost as funny as the pan flute flowchart
"Never squander your inventory of excuses." ... truer words have rarely been spoken.

The Speedvagen Part 2. The Race of Truth.

Since this blog is already a freakin Sacha White love fest, I'll dispense w/ my drivellings about the application and love of all bikes Vanilla and just stick to what I know/believe. So here goes.

The Geometry:
As I mentioned In Part 1, I've been riding a Steelman Eurocross for some time (it's not the only thing I've ridden in that time though, just the nicest). It's a "55cm". A 57cm tt, 72.5/73 head/seat w/ about 58mm-60mm of bb drop. Yep, that make for a high bb. The bike as built runs just shy of 19lbs with dura-ace/reflex wheels. The front end is quick and due to the bb height, the chain stays are short so it climbs well. I've never caught a pedal w/ my 175s....ever. Now, as luck would have it, I had the opportunity to ride w/ Sacha. I have my fit pretty well dialed on the Eurocross so it was just a matter of translating this to the Speedvagen geometry template. I wasn't exactly sure what that was (Sacha is a man of few words) but I knew the bb would be lower. I rode his Vanilla SS and while a teenie bit small, felt natural. I'm game. The high bb, while great on bumpy courses, required a bit a finessing at times, so lower felt like a good direction to go. When I finally got the SV built up, I took it, my sniffles, and all my expectations to my local cross course. I managed to get in 3 hot laps before my energy bottomed but it was enough. The bike felt glued to the ground, but very nimble up front. With out knowing the exact geometry, I was guessing 73/71.5 head/seat because it felt like an old Lemond I had w/ similar angles. Sacha emailed that the bike was in fact a 72.7 square w/70mm of bb drop. Ever so slightly quicker up front than the Steelman, a smidge more stable in the butt, and A LOT lower in the BB. I doubt I could have discerned a 0.2 angle difference on it's own, but the change in opposite directions of both the head and seat angles and the significant change in the bb made for a ride that felt both quick and smooth. Cross bike Feng-shui maybe? Hey, but that was only 3 laps on a course I knew well. What about a Race. Well, I raced it. What did I think? I didn't have to. That really sums it up best. I thought about the race, not about the bike. I did catch a pedal twice. I'm use to taking pedal strokes soon after exiting. High bb's will do that to you. Most other turns I was able to rail through, pushing it each lap until I would break lose a tire. Dismounts at speed were smooth and stable. I'm sold.

The Craft:
I'm one of those guys who appreciates craft, but is not big on ornamentation. While I love wiling away work hours drooling over cut and polished lugs, It's not what I buy. A very FX4M kinda guy (1st one to guess that license plate in the comments wins a Snickers). The Vagen has that in spades. Everything that Sacha could think of appears to have been tried and applied. I'm sure everyone who gives a shit is aware of the seatmast and the Paul brake sleeves brazed directly into the stays, but the reason for the madness is a rear brake that's as responsive as the front. Perfect, just perfect. The seatmast-thompsonfrankenpost itself is a beautiful, all stainless piece of work. Very oomph! The dropouts are very trick w/ replaceable stainless plates. I've also never owned a bike w/ so much sweet steel swaging. The top tube appears to be a Life or Zona teardrop which flattens on the bottom as you move toward the saddle thus making for a much more comfortable portage. The downtube is swaged longitudinally along the headtube and laterally (are those actual words?) along the BB. Not new, but it still takes work. Nice and stiff. No need for gussets. The stays are swaged beyond belief. So much swoopy goodness. It gives the rear suspension characteristic I've never experienced on a cross bike. To cap it off, the seat stays are swaged again below the brake bosses into almost a rectangular section. Vertically compliant, yet laterally stiff. Sunday's race was lumpy, but the behind of the beast stayed in contact. My lower back is sending flowers. Thank you Sacha.

The Paint:
This was quite a suprise. After seeing the SV at NAHMBS, I figured the frame to arrive w/ a purposeful powdercoat. I love powedercoat. Not paint sexy, but so midwestern practical. What arrived was a beauty of a frame w/ paint and custom graphics care of COAT. The graphics are especially sweet. The alpha Q fork graphics are painted on the inside to match those on the top tube! The toptube and seatstay graphics are more than just icing, punching way above their wieght. She got hit on a lot at the races. K-murder, you own! As the girls would say, "Truffles!"

The Nitpick:
No one's perfect, but Sacha and the Speedvagen come as close as anything or anyone out there. In order to deliver 30 Speedvagens by early October, production was streamlined by having help, namely Mike Desalvo. I'm not sure what he was responsible for, but I'm assuming he at least TIG'ed the main triangle. I've seen Mike's work at various shows, and well, quite frankly, it's not his best and looks a bit rushed. It's perfectly functional and clean, just not the beautiful, single pass beads that I've seen him do. Again, I'm nitpicking, but hey, this was not cheap frame. The dropouts, while tres qule, need a bit of refinement. I needed to file them a bit so the r. wheel would slide in. I also needed to file a bit off where the seatstay brazes on so I could run my 14-25 junior cassettes. Granted, that's non-standard, but it's a super easy fix for '08 models. The swaged chainstay+dropout combo make for slightly awkward rear wheel changes. The chain gets hung up easily. It's nothing as nerve racking as those moronic KLIEN rear-facing dropouts, but it takes some getting use to none the less. Lastly, the bolts on my seatmast keep loosening. Thanks to the design, there's little adverse effect. The seat height doesn't change because there are shims underneath. The seat itself doesn't move fore or aft because it's still clamped, but it rattles towards the end of a ride/race. It's happened more than once, even thread-locked. Sacha is working with me on it so I'll keep y'all posted. I'm not the least bit concerned.

The Verdict:
A bargain. Not just a good deal, a bargain. Don't believe me? Look around, ask questions, ride lots of bikes, do the math. If you love racing cross and aren't sponsored by Ridley so you can score a new frame every two years, do you're damnedest to get one. I sold a bike, several wheelsets, a vintage coke machine that took me months to restore, and countless other crap to finance it...it was that or the kids went to JCC. I don't miss any of it.

The sickly sweet maraschino cherry:
17.5lbs w/ Dura-ace+reflex+Flexus! 16.9lbs w/ Hugi+ZIPP+FMB! Schwing!

Epilogue:
In talking w/ Sacha, It was clear the Speedvagen project was a labor of love. A love of cross and a love for cross racers. It was a lot of work. Thanks to Sacha, Scott, Kmurder, Mike and anyone else (Molly?) who burned the oil to pull off the charrette! I may be having my worst season in years, but at least I'm enjoying it. Does that make sense?

The Face of "11" a.k.a. Race Report #5

Today was the 2nd race of the Pilarcitos series. Candlestick Park. Ugh. The two worst venues are out of the way. Candlestick is my least favorite course. I usually hope for an excuse to skip it...baby shower, root canal, almost anything really, but I was jonesing to race the new bike. I've been battling a cold all week and losing, but just couldn't wait another week. Crap course. Crap cold. Crap fitness. Let's race! Truth be told, the course was as good as one could expect thanks to a week of sporadic rain. The dry, bumpy, flat dustbowl, was now a slow bumpy, flat not-so-dustbowl. The rains made for slower laps as the grass had softened considerably. If you weren't pedaling, you weren't moving. There's really not that much exiting to talk about on the course. Lots of grassy turns, a few barriers, and along road section that flew you into the start/finish. whooppee. The 'run-ups' were all big-ringable on all but the first lap of mayhem and the road section had me spun out in my 44-14. It was a good course for Flexus. Ran mine at about 37psi. Could have run 35. My legs actually felt decent for the first time in weeks, I just didn't have the lungs this week to go with it. Ave HR was 166 w/ 25 minutes in Z4 and 28 minutes in Z5. I need to shift that to 15/35. Lost the sprint for something-ith place to TooTallJones. We played Cat-n-Mouse the whole race. He would dump me on the road, I would get him at the first set of barrier. Bell lap. I knew he was going to jump me as soon as we exited the dirt and he did. He got a gap so I played dead, then tried to stealth him w/ about 100 meters to go. Unfortunately, it's nigh impossible to stealth someone w/ Flexus on pavement. Loud enough to wake the dead. He heard my wind up and jumped, holding me off by 1/2 a bike. Next week, TooTall, next week, you single, kidless bastard. It was also a race of several 1sts. First race on Sram, and first race on the vagen. Sram has a few quirks which I'm still getting use to but I can't blame my suckness on missed shifts or anything of the sort. So far so good. As for the vagen, well you'll have to start here. Thanks for the photo Brian!

Speedvagen Part 1. The Backstory

Everyone who reads this blog, everyone who knows me, hell even a lot of people I'll never meet know I've got a Speedvagen. I've raved about it's potential, it's aesthetic, it's father, but now it's time to fess up. Does it live up to all the hype, expectations, exaltations? Bear with dear readers for 1st a little background.

I've been riding/racing a long time. Not as long as some, not as much as others, but I feel I've put in my time. I wrenched professionallyfor 12 years including some race support, messengered w/idiotic abandon, commuted diligently, raced poorly, blahblahblah and so on and so forth long enough to have given me the opportunity to ride/own lots of different bikes in varied situations. It's also taught me that while not everything new is better not everything new is evil either. Clipless is better, threadless headsets are better, disc brakes on cross bikes....um, er?. Carbon has a place (thought I'm not sure just where yet). I feel so extremely comfortable on a bike that it is an inseparable extension of me and who I am. For 30 years, my parents have asked me when am I going to stop racing. I'm 44 w/ two small children so I know what they're thinking. They still ask me. I finally told them "Never". *SIGH*. They are of a different generation. Anyway, for reasons which I've explained in the past, I LOVE cyclocross. I'm not great at it. I was always better at crits and track where a bit of smarts and luck can make up for a decided lack of genetics. I like it though because it's hard. Start to finish hard. I like it because it requires a perverse level of mental focus. I LOVE it because, well its cross. Part Circus Maximus (TM Monica), part self-mortification, part kid-friendly lollapalooza. Ahem,where was I? Oh yes, the Speedvagen, background...right. So my first cross bike was an Alan bought back in '91. I don't recall how I acquired it, but I had somehow gotten it in my head that driving 4 hours (each way!) to Chicago each weekend to race cross in the dead of winter would make for good cross training. Chicago cross is a blog unto itself but in a nutshell, that Alan was fine. Fast forward to 1999. I'm living in the bay area and haven't done a cross race since 1992. I find there are races right in my backyard, so I dust off the rig, toeclips and all, and proceed to scare the crap outta myself. The race has some crazy fast long bumpy descents and the forks on the ole aluminum death machine were no longer up to the task. Long story short, I find my way to Brent Steelman and treat myself to a real cross bike. It's been 7 years now and I'm on my 3rd Steelman. Brent is great and the bikes are a reflection. No nonsense, tough steel bikes, yet still light, responsive and clean. The man can torch. Brent, you will be missed. The latest incarnation is a Reynolds/Dedacciai mix w/ a nicely swagged downtube, thin-walled OS toptube and an alpha Q fork. I've been racing it for 5 year. I Love it. ............................It's now my pit bike.

Cyclocross de Montmartre 1945

This comes courtesy of PuddinPie. The other day I blogged about "The Cascades", but play close attention. They run up the stair to Sacre Couer! That is one monster set of stairs! Awesome! My wife is working on the transcript as we speak, right honey? Honey?

The Cascades.

When you've got kids, a full time job, and all the trappings that go along with said happy meal, you need to get creative w/ your training time. I use to go run stadiums at Cal, but it just wasn't doing it for me. Thus was born "The Cascades". Since I do alot of training on my lunch hour, as cross season would roll around I began looking for the equivalent of an urban cross loop. It needed to be close to work, incorprate some run-ups, have a bit of recovery and hopefully be accessible to others. A few years ago I stumbled up The Cleveland Cascade. Check out the pic. That's a looooong set of stairs. The real joke comes at the top when you remount and have to keep climbing for another 100 meters. Nice! A few wrong turns later and I had a good 5 minute loop. Eight repeats and I was ready to puke. So far so good. The only problem was, I was lonely. In the early days, my buddy Robeanski would tag along and that 130lb MF-er would put some hurt on. Still, I was often just solo. Last year, PuddinPie started coming out on a regular basis. I despised his youthful legs, but welcomed his non-stop banter. But that's about as big as it got. So today was a bit of a milestone. No less than 6 crossers showed up to do The Cascades. Myself, Rhoda, PuddinPie, Scarecrow, Jesus, and Rook. Fiesty shows up w/o a bike but sporting some smart and sassy running shorts. My heart sang...then the laps started and it almost stopped. Rhoda always thinks his size is a hindrance (think Chewbacca meets Magnus Backstedt), yet in the next breadth complains about not finding an indoor trainer that can provide enough resistance. I think his power output is about 1.21 jigawatts. Scarecrow shows up for the first time on some tired ole rag of a cross rig and quickly shows that it's most definateley not about the bike! Jesus shows up late, but provides us w/ ample opportunity for heckling as he does lap upon lap. PuddinPie, Rook and me pull up the rear. I'm so happy I could almost hurl. We must be doing 'em right. Rock on fellas.

Oh Fortuna, why hast thou foresaken me.

So here I sit eyeballing the nicest bike I've ever owned (see the Sacha love fest blogs below), while my immune system takes a siesta. I'm racing this thing this weekend no matter what. I know it's stupid so quit looking at me like that. I'm doing it. I need to race this thing. I said that already. More kleenex please. CRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAP.

Why Cross Rulz: Reason 48

Cyclocross Bike Racing Traffic Jam On Muddy Run-Up - Click here for this week’s top video clips

Why Cross Rulz: Reason 47

DFL Race 4 (finals) Cyclocross Dress.